He knew he would have to let go. Circumstances were proving to be too dangerous for her to stay by his side. Not to mention hat her mere presence was distracting him from his work. And nothing distracted him from his work. Nobody. She had to go.
He began by methodically searching for a method to remove her from him and him from her. The process had to be non-invasisve and had to create minimum damage for both individuals involved. He would tell her that he needed to leave for a mission of great importance and then would never return. He would perhaps fake his own death and she would be better off for it. She would move on and find happiness again. With another. But even the thought of her being someone else caused his stomach to tighten. However, he knew his work was far more important than any one woman. He needed to look at the greater good; he remembered why he had joined the force in the first place-to serve humanity,to save humanity, to protect humanity. From its own stupidity.
Humans tended to be overly optimistic and often ignored logic while making important decisions. Logic to him was everything. It had been logic which had prevailed in preventing mass terrorist attacks, protecting the lives of heads of state and in averting major missile crisis.
But in his refuge to logic, he had lost in touch with the human inside of him, the part in him which could love, which could give, which could feel without reasoning or questioning. He had become a machine, following orders, executing missions, killing the undesirables so that they could save the millions of others, because it made logical sense-one man's life over a thousand others. He knew it was logical to stay calm in a tense situation because the brain functioned better, he knew it was logical not to get too attached to people because it trained one to be independent, he knew it was logical to be prepared for all eventualities because the laws of probability dictated so.
However so, he could never have trained himself enough for her. Initially he told himself that she was a mere asset, she helped him when he needed it but why had he risked his own life to save hers? That had made no logical sense to him initially but he eventually explained it as his duty to repay the favour she had done him once. Then over the next few months, he justified her presence as a friend whom he could talk to and who could take care of him, giving him more time to focus on his work as his mundane tasks were taken care of.
But when those two men had attacked them, he had felt an innate desire to protect her, which he could no longer explain. He had wanted to kill the bastards who laid even a finger on her, for the first time he had valued someone's safety above his own without being duty-bound to do so. And that had to stop. Now.
He began by methodically searching for a method to remove her from him and him from her. The process had to be non-invasisve and had to create minimum damage for both individuals involved. He would tell her that he needed to leave for a mission of great importance and then would never return. He would perhaps fake his own death and she would be better off for it. She would move on and find happiness again. With another. But even the thought of her being someone else caused his stomach to tighten. However, he knew his work was far more important than any one woman. He needed to look at the greater good; he remembered why he had joined the force in the first place-to serve humanity,to save humanity, to protect humanity. From its own stupidity.
Humans tended to be overly optimistic and often ignored logic while making important decisions. Logic to him was everything. It had been logic which had prevailed in preventing mass terrorist attacks, protecting the lives of heads of state and in averting major missile crisis.
But in his refuge to logic, he had lost in touch with the human inside of him, the part in him which could love, which could give, which could feel without reasoning or questioning. He had become a machine, following orders, executing missions, killing the undesirables so that they could save the millions of others, because it made logical sense-one man's life over a thousand others. He knew it was logical to stay calm in a tense situation because the brain functioned better, he knew it was logical not to get too attached to people because it trained one to be independent, he knew it was logical to be prepared for all eventualities because the laws of probability dictated so.
However so, he could never have trained himself enough for her. Initially he told himself that she was a mere asset, she helped him when he needed it but why had he risked his own life to save hers? That had made no logical sense to him initially but he eventually explained it as his duty to repay the favour she had done him once. Then over the next few months, he justified her presence as a friend whom he could talk to and who could take care of him, giving him more time to focus on his work as his mundane tasks were taken care of.
But when those two men had attacked them, he had felt an innate desire to protect her, which he could no longer explain. He had wanted to kill the bastards who laid even a finger on her, for the first time he had valued someone's safety above his own without being duty-bound to do so. And that had to stop. Now.
I can't believe this...
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